The social construction described as toxic masculinity is a set of rules that limits the expected behavior of male individuals.
It is important to raise the question for the existence of different masculinities, since the characteristics of this construction will vary according to each man and the social and cultural reality that he is in.
And still, it is basically behaviors such as holding back feelings, controlling crying, not verbalizing love, limiting expressions of affection such as hugging or kissing a friend on the cheek, that make for some narrow rules for many boys.
Running away from these social rules and constraints often causes the penalty of being wrongly associated in a negative way with femininity, reducing them to a shallow idea of being “less of a man” for expressing their feelings.
Not having had released anything since June 2020, and with a totally different look, Tiago Iorc now returns with a new single, a kind of confession in a tone of veneration and proposes a reflection on toxic masculinity.
Sincerely, his music sounds like an invitation for men to question themselves about their structures, try to review their masculinity and make room for the feminine.
The more-than-six minutes of “Masculinity” that is presented in long verses is straight to the point and should be an object of social reflection, especially among men. Going further, the feminist movement must be even more naturalized, better understood and practiced by all, as the movement seeks equality between all individuals.
I invite you to watch the masculinity clip, pay attention to the song’s lyrics, and reflect:
Free translation in English:
Masculinity
I was into getting lost
money, fame, everything resolved
I pretended not to but I actually care
I thought I was cool
I wanted to be unanimous
I wanted to prove my virility
I doubted my validity
in virtual insanity
I take care not to be too sensitive
man don’t cry man this and that
I learned to be indestructible
i’m not real
chatting with my friends
I understand it’s not just me
To silence frailty is punishment
I am real
take care my brother
of your emotional
take care of what is real
take care my brother
of your emotional
take care of what is real
fragile masculinity, boy thing
I was profane and sex is divine
From my intimacy, I was a murderer
Crap…
As a child, I was called a fag.
as if it were a curse
what a weird thing
I learned it was wrong to be sensitive
how much innocence
I was afraid of my feminine
I became a repressed man
half soulless, half asleep
A phallic, self-destructive act
at the top and feeling depressed
I found myself cheating for cheating on me
I was a coward I was abusive
I thought I was strong, but I just ran away…
And I fell into pornography
This fuck is just addictive
Sucks your soul, empties you
And when you see the day has passed
And you think you should
have another body, another dick
Anxiety comes and stays
Fuck this is not life!
take care my brother
of your emotional
take care of what is real
take care my brother
of your emotional
take care of what is real
My father was my strongman reference
hardworking, generous, determined
But he always had difficulty speaking
My father’s father didn’t know how to express himself either
For these men it is necessary to cry
And forgive…
this saved pain
Until now as I write
It haunts me if what I say is what I owe
an echo of fear
What will they say?
What will they think?
Rejection teaches early:
Be nice or they’ll cancel you
What is this complex? Mom, is that you?!
I deluded myself in this image, I tried to hide
I can only be this James
Full of virtue, full of damage
What a caress to grow up, accept
Ai, ai
this male man, hurt
This violent man, raped man
man without love, man unloved
We need to take responsibility my friends
We create an extreme and oppressive world
Say there, if we’re not all crazy
for a hug
how tired
beware of excess pride
Beware of the superiority complex, but
be careful with excuses for everything
Beware of living in eternal childishness
Beware of radical patterns
beware of normal nonsense
be careful looking only at the sky
And turn a blind eye to the hell we are capable of
take care my brother
of your emotional
take care of what is real
take care my brother
of your emotional
take care of what is real
My soul is deep and if the fire in the shallows
My soul is deep and drowns in the shallows
My soul is deep and drowns in the shallows
I get dizzy
I get sad
I get little
I get scrotum
I follow to the letter
what is it to be a man
That does not exist
Life insists
All the time
That had to rethink
What is it to be a man?
What is it to be a man?
What is it to be a man?
What is it to be a man?
What is it to be a man?
there are so many
And so and so and so
possible men
real man and not ideal
Being a man for wanting to learn, every day
master yourself
In spite of any phobia: respect
it has to have chest
You have to have balls to love properly
Will I say no?
Sitting waiting for salvation?
connection, empathy, truth
divine purpose: responsibility
lay your head on the pillow and feel peace
for having lived an honest day
Ah…
Being a man requires much more than courage
Much more than masculinity
Being a man requires choice my brother
What’s up?
A tip for deconstructing paradigms:
Watching Jennifer Siebel Newsom‘s documentary The Mask You Live In (2015) can help to better understand the construction of toxic masculinity, as it brings to light the important reflection on the paradigm of sexist education and highlights how much suffering it can cause to boys and men, for being pressured, throughout life, to meet the expectations of a male society, constantly seeking to be what is considered a successful man.
