Assuming that we all are human beings…
Although I would like it if some extraterrestrial being was reading this text now and could help us, I believe not, because the world has so many other urges.
…we are anxious. There is no other way. There are a lot of expectations. Accepting this, it will be easier to deal with.
I have to be successful, you have to be too. Your dad expects you to graduate from the college you hate going to and your mom expects you to get married, have kids. Your friend’s successful career causes you insomnia, although you admire them, after all, we want people well but not better than us. (It’s okay, your friend looks at you and also thinks your life is better than his.)
That’s not enough, we have to be beautiful, healthy, be aware of all and any information, even if it’s random and superfluous. We must be alert to whether we are living in an abusive relationship and, if single, be alert not to become too demanding. In both cases, under no circumstances, do not stop socializing.
After all. To me, being a militant, feminist, actively trying to save the planet, you can put whatever you are demanding of yourself, add the aggravation of the global pandemic, which began in late 2019 and continues until today, and try not to leave aside all the other urgencies that this planet demands of us.
I told you, accept! There’s no way you can not be anxious living on Planet Earth. It would be strange if you didn’t recognize yourself with any level of anxiety.
Our life is based on expectations. Inside our mother’s womb, the crowd out there, for some reason already anxious for us, creating expectations if we would be a boy or a girl, if we would be more like father or mother. Ignoring the hypothesis that there are non-binary beings, ignoring the choice of gender, and the idea that we would possibly prefer to simply look like ourselves.
An entire childhood is based on expectations, expectations of being good at this or that, of becoming this or that. All of adolescence is based on the expectation of being accepted. From then until now and being an adult, it comes down to the expectation of finding our place in the world.
From a pragmatist point of view, I would like to say that we can continue in this existence based on anxiety generated by all these and other expectations. Or—yes, there is an or—desperately accepting that we need to learn to handle expectations better. And, thus, reduce our anxiety and better dialogue with the demands of the world.
And then, by accepting ourselves as we are and seeing what is being demanded of us, being able to discern things according to what we want and can give.
Your body and your shape, your mind and your intelligence, each of your cells are what you have to offer. Trying to mold yourself into patterns and be what you are expected to be will not help you to be any less anxious, let alone to love the essence of your being.
